"Mars Needs CEOs." This is funny because lots of CEOs suck, and sending them to a planet without any industry might be good.
"I come from a long line of single-celled animals." Life on Earth included only single-celled animals, to the best of our knowledge, for 1,000,000,000 years. I figure most of them didn't live long, so it is a very long line of single-celled animals.